“Today I would like to remember the families who can’t leave home. Maybe the only horizon they have is the balcony. And in there, the family, with the children, the kids, the parents… so that they can find a way to communicate well with each other, to build relationships of love in the family, and to overcome the distress of this time together, in the family. Let us pray for the peace of families today, in this crisis, and for creativity“. It was with this thought for parents and children forced home by the pandemic that Pope Francis began the morning mass broadcast live from Casa Santa Marta on March 21.
There is a lot of talk about the survival of families “forced” to live together for 24 hours sometimes in comic tones and sometimes in more serious tones because it is very common the belief that the members of the same family do not know each other well enough and that real life is out there.
I find myself in countertrend. It is true that family life is made up of small, repeated efforts. Sometimes we waste time and energy calculating how much more weight I carry than the other, and how much greater my commitment, my skill are. So let us look at Jesus taking up the cross and remember his entrustment to the Father, when he was still in the garden of olives. From the Father Jesus takes the strength to transform the shameful wood into a promise of eternal love. It’s a journey from the ego to the discovery of the other.
As a mother I had to make courageous choices that led me to slow down and sometimes to cancel my professional career in order to favour and put my family first. Often I was very criticized and sometimes I too had moments of second thoughts. Yet in this moment I am witnessing events that have made me proud of my choices that others and myself too have called renunciations.
My eldest son is in charge of food shopping and therefore forced queuing up long.
Together with his younger brother, he created a Whatsapp group by asking me for the mobile phones of the neighbours who are very old. They sent them a message offering to do the shopping for them and give it to them along with the medicine. They also called them with the video call to keep them entertained. They also brighten up their grandparents’ days. They also continue to study from a distance and do their homework diligently.
My husband, on the other hand, has a special permit to move because he works in private health care and so he is out all day but he is fine because he knows he can count on our responsibility.
In the evening, before dedicating ourselves to our activities, we spend some time together reflecting on one of the Stations of the Cross as we are in Lent. We take courage and work out together what is happening, each according to his or her own sensitivity.
Each of us learns a different lesson but certainly being together 24 hours a day does not represent a burden for us but an opportunity to enjoy each other better.
And it is in this situation that I wonder what would have happened to my family now if I had made different choices oriented only towards my professional career. I don’t have an answer and maybe it’s better not to give it. It speaks for itself.
As Jesus teaches us, we must take our Cross and carry it forward as best we can, without turning back but looking forward.
~ Germana, Executive Secretary MSC Generalate